Officially Official

This email just came out from my manager:

I am sorry to say that after 4 years with Hewitt, Heather has decided to leave and move on to a different challenge. She will actually be leaving the workforce (temporarily) as she returns to university in September, to attend Law School.

Heather's last day in the office will be August 10. I am sure you will all wish her good luck.

I am hyperventilating. It's a little scary to see it out there in black and white. After today, only 7 work days to go.

Selling it

Buying gifts for my Dad is hard. He is a down-to-earth kind of guy who seems to not want for much, and what he does want for he usually just buys at Canadian Tire/Home Depot (ASIDE: Shortly after my parents moved to their new house, my Father returned home on evening and announced to my Mom: “Guess What! I found a short-cut to Canadian Tire”. Canadian Tire is less than 5 minutes away, without the “short cut,” but my Father’s new route shaves valuable seconds.)

So, because I always have a hard time buying him a gift I feel like I have to get creative. As a result of my “creativity” I have noticed a strange habit on my part of trying to “sell” the gift as he opens it. “It’s for____________!” I’ll exclaim, or “You can use it when you_______.” I can’t just give it to him and let him figure out on his own why I chose it. I’ve got to give him a REASON HE’LL LOVE IT!

I picked up his birthday gift at lunch today. I think he’d like it if he is willing to try it, but he might think is hippie and new agey and girly. This one might be a tough sell. Wish me luck.

Racism Roulette

*I actually wrote this last week, but in the rush to get ready to go to Vegas I didn't have time to post it. But it is still funny and worth sharing. Incidently, I did not win.*

Last Thursday Taleen stopped by my desk to giggle and squeal over how we were leaving for Vegas the very next day, and she mentioned that I should rub AM’s five-months pregnant belly for luck before we left. So later that day, while I was chatting to the three co-op students, AM came by to see one of them, I remembered to ask, and got in a quick rub . Then, in a flash of brilliance, I asked her due date thinking that after the belly rub, the due date numbers would be a sure thing on the roulette wheel. The following exchange took place:

“AM, what’s your due date? I’ll play the numbers on roulette.”

“October 31.”

“October 31. Good 10, 31”

*a pause as I recall the gambling wisdom I overheard at Taleen’s shower: always bet on black.*

“Black”

*another (pregnant, if you will) pause, before as the 4 people gathered around R’s desk explode into laughter, and I collapse on the floor in a combination of embarrassment and uncontrollable laughter. *

AM and her husband are Jamaican.