Discovery

The great thing about the sleep deprivation is that eventually, and just in time for the deadline, you become so delirious that you're convinced your paper is AWESOME.

77 is the new 100

UBC Law has a grading policy. There is no required bell curve, but for classes of a certain size, there is a required average. This average has to be between 69 and 74. This leads to the phenomenon of our Regulatory State presentations having a range between 7.2 and 7.7 out of 10. My group got 7.6, and normally I'd be ready to stick my head in the oven after a grade like that, but given the circumstances, I guess I should be quite happy. It's above average, and really what more can I ask for? I just feel a little defeatist about it, though. I mean, why struggle so much for a good grade, when it might make 2 or 3 percent difference? It's just totally lame.

Violent Dreams

Last night, for the third night in a row, I had a dream where I was giving someone a right good beating. Seriously - hair-pulling, kicking, punching in the face. The first night it was a 20-something man in a 1980's style red jogging suit who stole my wallet, the second night it was an old lady who had broken in and was defiantly squatting in the his enormous house in which I was baby-sitting/house-sitting, and last night it was this big, fat, mobster looking guy, who was a hospital administrator who had refused to admit my pregnant and car-accident-injured friend, and she ended up losing her baby. Needless to say, in every instance I was protecting somebody, or at least trying to make two wrongs equal a right (is that better than randomly beating on people?). The dreams have been incredibly vivid and detailed and long (I've only put in a teeny bit of detail here), but in each one, I have wound up either sitting on the victims chest and punching them in the face or grabbing them by the hair, and banging their head against the ground.

I'm extremely disturbed by these dreams. I mean, I know they're just dreams, and better I beat someone up in my dreams than in real life, but it makes me wonder if it's something I would be capable of? Is there a part of me that is THAT violent? That angry? I know I've been pretty stressed out and all, but this seems excessive.

I used to think I was smart...

Well, it's not THAT bad. YET.But I am getting awfully tired of these exams.
Elisabeth asked me if this is worse than the SOA exams, and I have to say yes, for two reasons.
1) the SOA exams were ONE day. In total my exams/papers are spanning two weeks. Two weeks is a long time to eat poorly, sleep too little and stress a lot.
2) the SOA exams had right answers. Law school is just full of ambiguity. And ambiguity makes me sad. Right answers make me feel smart. I used to think I was smart.

I hate the spelling of the word "judgment"

Judge + ment = Judgment. It's like a magic trick. Where did the "e" go? Ohhh, pretty sneaky. So flippin' dumb. I get irrationally pissed off every time I spell it wrong in Word, and that little red wiggly line appears underneath it. Not only is it a stupid way to spell the word, you would think that Word would at least autocorrect this one.

Super-Hot Interview Shoes

I don't really have time for a post of any substance, so here is a picture of my super-hot interview shoes that I bought last week. I love them a lot, and shopping for them rekindled my dormant love of footwear, but also moved my love in a newer, sexier, and far less practical direction.



And these are not the only shoes I bought last week. I bought another, very impractical pair, which I can ill afford at the moment, but my goodness, I have wanted a pair in this particular style for about 8 years, and I figured it was about time. So, I have beautiful shoes now, but they don't go with the jeans and sweats I wear to the library. So sad.

too many heathers

Me

my room-mate, dentist heather

jodi's high-school best friend, london heather

3rd year law Rugby team-mate, tiny heather

2nd year law Rugby team-mate, heather p.

I guess that's only five. but it seems like a lot. when i was elementary school i thought my name was terribly uncool, because i was the only one, but there were two stephanies and three sarahs, and I think a few jennifers. where were all these people back in elementary?

just like home

Even though it is not a picture of Alberta, this photo made me really feel the deep down need to live in my home province again. There is something about the land, the landscapes, that simply makes my heart ache with longing. Vancouver is a beautiful city, but this what is what my true homeland looks like
www.dooce.com/daily-photo/2007/12/04/foothills
Sorry, I have no idea how to create embedded links, and with my Consitutional Law exam tomorrow, now is not the time to figure it out. Y'all will just have to copy-paste.

good things

Today was long day at the library, followed by more studying at home. It was not a fun day by any stretch of the imagination, but I can think of at least three things that made me happy today:
1) Miss Jodi-bean, my law-school-best-friend, who has become my closest classmate, and breaks up a long day at the library with lots of stifled giggles from occasion jokes on MSN.
2) SNOW - it snowed all day today, and it stuck around to make a beautiful feathery blanket. At 10 o'clock tonight Jodi and I tossed our work aside (metaphorically, of course, we work mainly on laptops which are not very forgiving when it comes to the tossing aside) and set out for a refreshing walk. It was corn starchy snow that squeaked under our feet as we strolled under the sugar coated elm trees that line my street. We ran across a playing field near my house, played at the playground, and threw snowballs. It was just the break I needed.
3) I get my new bed tomorrow. I could not be more thrilled that tonight is the last night for me on the floor.